Recently I had the privilege of spending a few days with both of my daughters and four grandchildren. The older I get, the more I cherish the times we have together and when things become hectic, as they are bound too with three families together, I remind myself of this precious fleeting time.
During the visit, we all went roller-skating. My job was to watch Jeremy, eleven months old, while the others showed their expertise on the rink floor. Before long I realized that I had another duty - keeping myself from having a heart attack while watching my oldest grandson, Joshua, learn to skate.
Joshua is a very determined, independent eight year old, who is already very much a perfectionist. He met this new challenge in the same way. He allowed his aunt to help him for about one turn around the rink and then he struck out on his own. I cannot describe to you how hard he tried. He did not realize that skating did not require picking your feet up in the same manner as walking does.
Therefore, as he went around the rink, his arms were flapping; his legs very rubbery looking and his entire body seem to have come unglued. Then he would fall; maybe sprawl is a better word to describe his collapse on the floor. He would hit that floor so hard and I held my breath waiting to see what parts of his body would be left on the floor when he got up. Every time he fell, he would fight to get back up as fast as he could, ready to start again. He did this repeatedly. As I watched him, I hurt. He would smash his nose, bend his arms back behind him, not to mention the danger of the other skaters whizzing by him as he lay on the floor struggling to get back up.
There was nothing I could do but pray he would not get hurt as I watched him battle around that rink time after time.
He would not quit or slow up. When he would stumble in for a quick rest, I would ask him if he was ok. He would look at me with those big puppy dog brown eyes and say, "Yes, Mimi; this is fun. Am I doing good, Mimi?" I would smile and say "yes" and off he would go looking like a circus clown doing somersaults in his falling act.
As I watched Joshua, I realized that we do the same thing throughout life. We all have dreams and goals we try to achieve in our lives. We start out all excited, believing that we can conquer any problem or any obstacle that comes our way. Then we get knocked down. We get back up, dust ourselves off and start again. Next thing we know, we are kissing the ground again and we find it a little harder to get up. We start again but with less enthusiasm and zeal. The next time we fall, it is very easy to just stay down. Some of us get back up but then we sit down not bothering to try again. We find it easier to quit than to keep trying and continue getting bumped and bruised in the progress. Some give up on a dream just when success is in sight.
Joshua came flying into the stands and said "Mimi I need a drink." As we were getting a drink, he skated around on the carpeted area of the rink. Suddenly he was not picking his feet up as much. He was pushing off, shifting his weight from one foot to another and lo and behold, he was actually skating. His arms were more still and his whole body seem to come back together. I was so proud. I squealed, "Joshua that is it. You are really skating." He looked at me a little puzzled and said, "I know Mimi. I have been skating all night."
That is when I realized his secret of success. Joshua did not know that he was not skating like every one else. He was doing the best he knew how to do and was putting a 100% of himself into his efforts. He never knew that he did not look like the others or that he was not an expert. It did not matter to him. He just kept working hard and his efforts paid off. Soon he was going around the rink like a pro making it look so easy to the ones watching him.
Joshua taught me two important lessons that night. The obvious lesson is to keep trying, keep getting up and never quit. Never say never and have the confidence that you can do anything if you work hard enough.
The other lesson was not as obvious but was probably the most important to learn. Keep your eyes on your goals and not on the people or circumstances around you. Joshua was concentrating so hard that he did not see the other smooth skaters around him. He had his mind's eye set on what he wanted to do, therefore that is what he saw himself doing. He never saw the stumbling or awkwardness that others may have seen. He did not care what he looked like to others; he only cared about finishing the task. How many times do we quit a task because we think we look foolish to others?
We left that night with a very happy camper. We did our share of ranting, raving and praising but Joshua needed no one's approval. He knew he had done his best, had been determined to learn and had refused to quit. He was satisfied with himself. That made him happy! Now isn't that a great lesson to learn? I know it was for this Mimi.
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