Frienemies

This is another exciting chapter from Excuse Me, My Brains Have Stepped Out

I wish I could say we'd all go through life meeting this person only once. Unfortunately, this breed type is so rampantly found, they'll have you feeling like you slipped on a banana peel. You didn't see it coming and yet there you are, embarrassingly sprawled on the floor feeling absolutely stupid. What is a frienemy?

These are the friends who give you absolute assurance that with friends like them, you just don't need enemies. Through chance meetings, mutual acquaintances or just from sitting in their comfort zones, a frienemy will stay with you for a variety of reasons.

These are people, who whether they will admit it or not, have a deep desire for some sort of validation. Be it emotional, physical, sexual or materialistic they cannot function without having to be with someone who is able to provide them with benefits in one way or another. So, when these benefits run out (as it often will) they will sell you out in a heartbeat.

You are only considered a friend when your benefits to them and for them outweigh the benefits they gain by putting you down. Because they are so called 'friends', of course at some point privacy walls are let down and they've been allowed into your life and some information has been given while other bits have been left unspoken or uncovered.

Once they have moved on and are with their new set of 'friends', they'll revel in spewing out every assumption they can about you. The more information they can share, gain, buy and sell, the better. Some might be exaggerated versions of the truth and others might be blatant lies but when it's all mixed up like that, don't waste your time trying to make sense of it.

Frienemies are also this special breed that seem to think they have every right to bring someone down because they feel rewarded in some way but fail to realise two things. One - (cough, cough) they are no where close to being perfect and two - what goes around, comes around. It may take awhile, but then somehow, it always does.

Yes, frienemies are a special (common, but special) breed of people that come wrapped in the tinseldust of friendship and invisible wrapping paper called betrayal. These are the people you desire to stay away from but cannot learn about trust until you've met at least one or two of them. The sweeter their assurances of friendship, the deeper you'll feel the wounds of betrayal.

But, frienemies teach you a very important lesson. They point you in the directions of the real friends who stay when the rest of the world walk out and they show you, painfully but surely, that at the end of the day what really matters most is that, it isn't what the world thinks about you, it really is what you think of yourself.

To read other thoughts, memories and lessons from Excuse Me, My Brains Have Stepped out please click here.