Thursday, 22 November 2012

Paula Renaye - I Don’t Want To & You Can’t Make Me!

by Paula Renaye 

Last week I was at a conference where I did a presentation and also had a booth. The talk went great, and while the screaming Belief Monkey flying across the room was a big hit with the crowd, my memorable moments came after the talk.

I love it when something I say sparks an insight or new awareness, and when that also triggers a personal shift within, well, it is just magical—and it’s why I do what I do. 

On the other hand, there were some who stopped by to chat who hadn’t heard me speak. If they had, they would have known to steer clear. But my book’s bright yellow-tangerine color and mesmerizing title called to them like a moth to a flame. Of course, it was actually that they knew they needed it.

Living the Life You Love. “Oh, yes, I want that!” Even after picking it up and reading the subtitle—The No-Nonsense Guide to Total Transformation—things were still going okay. But then, as most of us do, it came time to read the back cover.

After reading it and flipping through a few pages of the text, one woman simply said, “I know I need to make changes, but I don’t want to.” As she laid the book back down, she added, “I’m just not ready.”

Okay. I didn’t try to talk her into or out of anything, just told her it was really great that she was being honest with herself. The internal struggle was evident in her eyes, but she said, quite wisely, “You can’t do it until you want to,” then turned and walked away.

Another woman nodded along as she read the top three paragraphs. The bullet points put a stop to the nodding, but she kept reading until she got to, “New ways to look at food, exercise and money that make healthy choices easy.” I know that’s the point she got to because she read it out loud and dropped the book back on the table. “No, no I can’t do that! I don’t want to do that!” she said, then literally ran from the booth. The “And you can’t make me!” was implied if not actually spoken.
I have great compassion for the runners. I know what it feels like to be in that place of knowing you need to make changes and terrified of what it will mean if you do. I also know that the only way to get out of that pain is to stop running and face it down. You’ve got to make a stand and do something about it.

The glimmer of light is that whether they realized it or not, just by picking up that book and reading a few words they pushed themselves closer to wanting to. They may have said some version of, “I don’t want to and you can’t make me,” but what I heard was, “I know I need to do this and I will—I will!—I’m almost ready.”

* * * * *
Paula Renaye is a tough love coach, transformational speaker and five-time award-winning self-help author of Living the Life You Love: The No-Nonsense Guide to Total Transformation. Paula will be presenting two “cut to the chase and get it done” Personal Transformation Workshop Retreats in Destin, Florida in December. Registrations for these exclusive events are strictly limited to allow maximum interactive coaching for each woman, so sign up now to reserve your place. Details at


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Books Sold - 6 Nov 2011 to 31 May 2012

Some of you have asked me for my total number of books sold to evaluate KDP Select so here it is. Bear in mind, that results will vary based on genre and author. Good luck and remember, Keep Moving Forward.

Total - 120,836

1. Excuse Me, My Brains Have Stepped Out
Amazon Kindle - 42,559
Paperback -
Smashwords -

2. Frequent Traveller
Amazon Kindle - 35277
Paperback -
Smashwords -

3. Dora's Essentials - Books, Blogs & Smiles 1
Amazon Kindle - 462
Smashwords -

4. Mirror Me Martha (Short Story)
Amazon Kindle - 281
Smashwords -

5. Drive On Hope (Short Story)
Amazon Kindle - 190
Smashwords -

6. Blog-A-Licious Directory 2012
Amazon Kindle - 1
Smashwords -

7. Pandora's Reading Room 1
Amazon Kindle -
Paperback - N/A

8. The Cat That Barked (Short Story)
Amazon Kindle -

9. Dora's Essentials - Examining Anxiety
Amazon Kindle -

10. Dora's Essentials - Books, Blogs & Smiles 2
Amazon Kindle -

11. Elevenses from Around the World
Amazon Kindle -

12. Genetically Modified Foods vs. Sustainability
Amazon Kindle -

Blog-A-Licius - Sherbet Blossom



Dealightfully Frugal

Blog-A-Licious - The Few, The Proud, The Wife


My Soul Slippers

Blog-A-Licous - Textbook Mommy

Blog-A-Licious - Blue Frogs Legs

Blog-A-Licious - Pretty All True

Pretty All True

Blog-A-Licious - tbaoo



Powered by

Blog-A-Licious - The Invisible Art

Blog-A-Licious - Rediscovering Domesticity

Rediscovering Domesticity

Blog-A-Licious - Quiver Full

Blog-A-Licious - Cori's Big Mouth

Blog-A-Licious - Great Fun


Blog-A-Licious - Busy Wife

Blog-A-Licious - Steps To Happiness

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Blog-A-Licious - Toby & Max

Blog-A-Licious - Amelie

Raising Amelie

Blog-A-Licious - Peas In A Pod

Blog-A-Licious - Riley

Blognostics - Poetry


My Awards - September 2010

My Awards - September 2010
Awarded By Jo Frances

My Awards - May 2011

My Awards - May 2011
Awarded By Alejandro Guzman

My Awards - May 2011

My Awards - May 2011
Awarded by Kriti Mukherjee

My Awards - April 2011

My Awards - April 2011
Awarded By Roy Durham

My Awards - June 2011

My Awards - June 2011
Awarded By Sulekha Rawat

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