Paula Renaye - Who’s Writing Your Story?

by Paula Renaye

As regular readers probably know, I write both fiction and nonfiction. Today, I've been working on one of my mystery novels. That doesn't mean I don't have other things to do to promote my upcoming new nonfiction book, Living the Life You Love—I have multiple lists for that. However, I guess my brain needed a break, so I was out running around Kickapoo, Texas with Jolene, and laughing myself silly. 

It sounds crazy, but I really don't remember what I’ve written, and it always catches me off guard. I was zipping through the comments from the editor, trying not to read very much, but I couldn't help myself. The Tough Love BFF Coach me just shook her head at fictional character Jolene’s way of dealing with things. The reader me laughed. Here’s a little snippet:

But maybe I just wasn't seeing the bigger picture—and maybe I didn't want to. Denial danced a jig through my brain chanting, when in doubt, block it out.

Now, you'd have to read it in context for it to be funny, but it’s really how we handle things a lot of times. If we don’t want to hear it or face it, we simply and deliberately block it out, and Jolene gives great examples of what not to do! 

Those lines were from the first book in the series—her first foray back to her old hometown to deal with her recently widowed mother, who's turned into a granny-gone-wild with a gun. Dealing with Mommy Dearest’s antics is bringing up issues—lots and lots of issues—and Jolene clearly isn’t following the suggestions in my self-improvement books. By book three, she’s showing a little progress, although still fighting against it. In the next scene, she’s taken aback by a “not from around here” medical examiner, who seems to see right through her.

“I have nothing more than I did this morning, Sheriff, however, I did get another call regarding the case.” He glanced in my direction, although there was no way he could have known it was me. “A woman from the newspaper.”

He continued to stare as if he did know, so apparently he was psychic too. Or, I could have just been feeling extremely guilty. Lucille had done a stunning job of instilling that. So, figuring confession was the best plan at this point, I said, “That was me, and I apologize for the misrepresentation. I do write for a paper, however—in Denver.”

“I know.” Then, he said something I would have never guessed would flow from the lips of anyone living in Redwater Falls, Texas, “Although, we are where we want to be, aren’t we, Jolene?”

Now why would he say that? Oh, I knew very well what the phrase meant. God knows my best friend Tanya said it to me enough times when I was unhappily married to Danny, adding that, “If you wanted it to be different, it would be.” It had really pissed me off until I finally realized she was right and got myself a divorce.

That’s how it was for me too. I knew the words long before I could walk the talk. And I didn’t like it when others pointed that out to me either. But, the more they did, the harder it was to ignore. And, eventually, I couldn’t—and didn’t want to.
I eventually realized that I was the one pulling my own strings—I was the one writing my own story. And, I could change it if I wanted to.

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Paula Renaye has won four national book awards for her nonfiction and Paula Boyd has won a literary award for fiction. Visit http://paularenaye.com and http://paulaboyd.com. Paula’s new title, Living the Life You Love: The No-Nonsense Guide to Total Transformation, is receiving enthusiastic responses internationally.